While
I might have taken a two (or three…) month’s break to concentrate on matters of
the heart, no one else can catch literary lightening in the bottle like the
Despotic Queen!
A 3-month
absence might be considered cyber suicide but fuck anyone who thought HRH was yesterday’s
blog.
I’ve
danced with El Diablo, let him suck my wrinkled titties of tyranny dry and now
it’s time for a glittering, lame winged phoenix to rise once more. Order will
be brought. Fear will be installed. Chitlens will be tasered.
Mid-market
footwear fuckers, you’ve just been put on notice. HRH has slipped on her
rumblin’ weave, it’s about to get ugly!
MOMMY’S
HOME!
But
before I make like Pol Pot, I would like point out that my old adversaries at
Tony Bianco thought they’d outwitted Imelda by not uploading this season’s
Camilla Skovgaard knock-offs, but all da bitches know, Imelda's all-seeing, all-knowing and she certainly doesn’t need
Facebook to shut you down. FYI, the acrid stench of your douchery is ubiquitous…even
in hell.
It seems the absence was good for the Despotic Queen. Yesterday 3D published (above) an interview with Imelda and The Style Tyrant claiming we are the ‘fifth-best
fashion bloggers in the world’.
How
they arrived at the #5 will remain much like Yum Yum’s herculean tolerance for
pain and degradation, one of life’s unsolved mysteries.
I
would question how much paint the 3D/LURE crew huffed before penning those
claims but Imelda’s answers are equally, if not more, fucked-up…and y’all know
how much paint I huff. But Rupert, thank you I feel honoured.
Suave
journos wheedling their way into Imelda’s favour by peppering my ego with
accolades aside, to ALL mah Imeldettes who emailed asking where I’ve been, if I’m
coming back, or how to apply fake-tan your prosthetic leg (for reals)...
I LOVE
YOU!!!!!
This
blog is and will always be for YOU, my beloved Imeldettes.










So happy you're back!
Posted by: Bianca | July 28, 2010 at 12:32 PM
Bianca - I'm happy that you're happyxxx...Now that I'm back hopefully this will put an end all the fucking spam comments that have been posted in my absence.
Posted by: Imelda Matt | July 28, 2010 at 12:49 PM
I've been waiting in my (diamante) shackles by the door! :-) xo
Posted by: K-Line | July 28, 2010 at 11:46 PM
The triumphant return! HURRAH!
Posted by: Sally | July 29, 2010 at 01:42 AM
Would pay good money to see you and Tony Bianco in a westside story style dance fight xx
Posted by: Lisadom | July 29, 2010 at 05:44 AM
JOY! SWOON! The world is now properly askew on its axis again.
Posted by: Fashion Herald | July 31, 2010 at 01:45 AM
YAY FOR MOMMY!
Posted by: Sister Wolf | August 01, 2010 at 11:37 AM
So lovely to have you back. Loving the photos by the way... who's a handsome boy then?
x
Posted by: Lady Smaggle | August 01, 2010 at 08:58 PM
WELCOME HOME!!! <3 (finally bitch)
Posted by: TheShoeGirl | August 02, 2010 at 05:00 PM
Finally! Missed your tirades so much! Hip hip hurray for Imelda!
Posted by: rena -myfavouriteshoes from Holland | August 06, 2010 at 10:38 PM